Tuesday, November 30, 2010

The Violation of Jack, in Four Acts

Act One: The Acquisition of Jack

In contemplating a move to the greater Phoenix area, I decided that I needed a vehicular with working air conditioning. Ron helped me find a cheap truck that fit the bill. We pulled it down behind the U-Haul, and It's served me well so far. There is a bevy of problems with the truck, but it gets me from place to place and that's good enough for me. The suspension is a little wonky so it leans a bit. I named it Jack, after the guy in "While You Were Sleeping"

Act Two: Riding on the Metro

Since I've moved to Arizona, I park and ride to work. You see, the Metro Light Rail goes right through both ASU and downtown Phoenix. (♫ Riding on the Metro-o-o ♫) Some days I work at ASU, and some days I work at TGen in downtown Phoenix, and sometimes I go back and forth between the two. The Metro is pretty convenient for this. Plus, my work bought me a year train pass, so I get to ride the Metro for free.

Act Three: The Violation of Jack

Today I drove Jack to the Park and Ride lot like I always do. I rode the Metro to TGen in Phoenix. I went to my meeting. I had lunch. I rode the Metro back to ASU. I finished my normal workday out. I rode the Metro back to the Park and Ride Lot. (♫ Riding on the Metro-o-o ♫) I went to where I had parked Jack, The first thing I noticed was bits of glass sparkling in the lamplight.
 The second thing I noticed was the lack of glass in the driver's side door of my truck.
 The third thing I noticed was a bunch of wires sticking out where my stereo used to be. A bunch of other things hit me faster than I could number them. My glove box was open, but the only thing that seemed to be missing was a small box of tampons. Maybe the thief was a female and had a need for such supplies. I resent the taking of the stereo, but I'd never begrudge relevant supplies to a fellow female in need. I had assumed that the thief was male, but I couldn't figure out why a dude would steal that and not the pair of pliers that were right there. Later, I found the box on the floor and alleviated that particular bit of confusion. I was back to resentment. I could tell they looked behind my seat, but I don't think they took anything else. I'll check a little more carefully when its light outside.

I dedicate the following song (starts at around 1:34) to my stereo...

Act Four: Comfort Food

The thieves took many things. They took my stereo. They took my sense of security. They took some of my time, as I called the police and such to report the crime. I'll get back to you on the other things they took.

One thing they didn't take? Maurice the dash pig. (crazy ol' Maurice, always good for a laugh). Also, they didn't take the ten dollars I had in the ash tray! I used this ten dollars to buy myself some comfort food, namely, a Sonic hamburger with green chile on it (hooray living in the Southwest again!), french fries, diet coke with the lovely little pebbly Sonic ice, and a chocolate malt. And then I went home and ate it all as I watched several episodes of "Jeeves and Wooster." There may or may not be a long list of chores that need doing, but I decided to neglect them all in favor of venting to you in this blog post. I think it worked, as I feel much better. A bit emotionally drained, but better.I'll just go to bed early tonight. Things always look better after a good nights sleep...

I'll most likely ride the bus to the Metro tomorrow (♫ Riding on the Metro-o-o ♫), so I can call around and find out the best place to take Jack to have his window replaced. It's not the end of the world. Its just a pain. At least it does't snow in Phoenix. In fact, it's supposed to get back up into the 70s this weekend.

Pros of living in Phoenix include the great winter weather. Cons of living in Phoenix include the rampant thievery. Also, people that with a lack of personal hygiene that ride the Metro. (♫ Riding on the Metro-o-o ♫) Seriously people, would a bath every few days kill you? Blech.

Ah well... C'est la vie... Such is life...


  1. Nice Production! That reminded of how much I love Terry Fador! Sorry for your misfortune, but at least you have a variety of songs running through your head to hum in your stereo's absence. Love Ya- Hope you get to buy a new car soon!

  2. awww, I'm sorry you lost your stereo. When I moved here to SLC, I had my stroller stolen and then all my neighbors had to share with me their stories of what had been stolen from them. People suck everywhere (but especially those darn Utes, arrgghh!) (I have to prove to myself that I'm still a Cougar by hating th U even if I just enrolled at the U).
    I like your videos, made your story feel like a movie :) I miss you!!!

  3. Your post really makes me want to hit someone! I once was the proud owner of a suzuki samari, not valuable in any way shape and or form. In fact, it was a peice, but due to the non working gas gage I always had to have a full gas can in the back seat just in case. Well, one day I arrived and my car door was open. There was not even a stereo in the Suzuki, but the jerks stole my gas. It is really annoying to be theived from. I feel your pain.